We often find that adult children and their aging parents will come to our office and present to us, their newly recommended estate planning attorney, a last will and testament that is at least twenty years old. This estate planning document nominates a brother or a sister as a guardian for the minor children. It also provides for the assets to be distributed on death to a bank trust company that is to retain the assets in trust until the children have attained age 21.
One of the problems with this estate plan, which needs updating, is that the youngest of the children is now age 25 and the eldest is age 35. In addition, the bank nominated in the last will and testament to serve as the trustee is no longer in business. Further, if there was a trust agreement, it was never funded.
In this scenario, we are fortunate that the parents lived these many years and it was not necessary to use the estate plan, or even fund the trust. In situations like this, one of the ways we can help the parents is by drafting a new estate plan that corrects these issues. For example, the new trust agreement could dispense with the need for a guardian of minor children and name a trust company now in existence to serve as the trustee.
The parents, however, have aged to the point that a new estate plan alone is not sufficient for them. The parents need their own updated advanced directives in the event of a disability. Therefore, the parents will also need to consider signing, at a minimum, durable powers of attorney, health care surrogate designations, and living wills.
Further, they need to consider long-term care planning.
An estate plan alone will not be sufficient to help them be able to afford the high cost of long-term care in an assisted living facility with memory care or a skilled nursing home. Medicare is also not able to help with the cost of the daily custodial care. The parents need an estate plan but also an elder care plan that can help them plan for how they will be able to afford long-term care and not lose their lifetime of savings.
We work with parents and adult children each day to tackle this difficult issue.
The key is to not put off this type of planning as time is of the essence. If you have questions on this or any issue, we encourage you to contact us to schedule a meeting.
Every year, millions of American families face the difficult decision of how to help an aging parent who can no longer fully take care of himself or herself. For many families, the answer is to provide needed caregiving services themselves. While this seems like an easy solution at first, it is not.
There is much to know about caregiving, and several initial questions to consider, include:
Are you qualified to take care of an elder parent?
Some aging loved ones require assistance with meal preparation, bathing, and getting dressed. Others may need assistance taking medications and short trips to the doctor’s office. Florida seniors with serious health conditions or mental illness, however, may need professional care.
Are you financially prepared?
Caregiving is expensive, but there are ways to obtain financial support. Although most seniors expect Medicare to help cover the costs of aging, often it cannot. Medicaid and veterans benefits, however, may be available as resources. Further, long-term care insurance, Social Security income, and various tax deductions for out-of-pocket expenses may also apply.
How will caregiving affect your emotional and mental health?
Providing care for elderly parents can be emotionally and mentally challenging, especially as loved ones continue to age and their health declines.
If you can affirmatively answer these questions, or are committed to developing healthy caregiving strategies, you may also want to consider:
Family caregivers can be paid. If an aging parent has the resources to pay for a family caregiver, there is no reason not to explore this possibility. The key is creating the right contract for your needs. Do not wait to meet with an experienced elder care attorney about this type of contract.
Sibling conflicts. Caregiving responsibilities usually fall on one adult-child family member more than any other. This often leads to sibling strife even in the most “functional” families, and especially over issues concerning money, fairness and important health decisions. Discuss ways to prevent these issues now, as things may get harder in the future.
Moving in.Nursing homes and assisted living facilities are expensive. One cost-effective option, however, is to have your aging parent move into your home. As long as your relationship is healthy, it can be a rewarding experience for all involved and provide much needed care.
Taking care of yourself.The demands of family caregiving can lead to burnout and poor health. Often, we find these problems stem from putting an elder parent’s needs before your own. As a caregiver, try not to avoid your needs in this setting.
With over thirteen million Americans currently caring for their children and parents, we know you may need guidance on how to balance these responsibilities. We know this article also may raise more questions than it answers. Do not wait to contact our office to discuss your needs, and those of your family, today.